Slow To Speak

I have had so little to say lately.  See the starfish?  Self portrait.

My last blog post was over two weeks ago, but each time I've attempted to put some thoughts down since then, I've found I really don't have anything that original to say. I imagine you, dear reader, skimming halfway through it and realizing you just wasted five minutes of your day reading something that numerous others have already said in some form.

I can't think of much to share on Facebook either. 

My status updates are half as numerous, and they're mostly about my kids. I change my mind and delete about 90% of the comments I'm about to post, because I'm not convinced that they'll actually make anybody's day better.  Someone in my friend list posted an emotional plea yesterday, trying to persuade others to agree with her about a hot-button parenting issue. I'm not one for arguing just for the sake of arguing, especially about issues like this one, but quite often I'll chime in and encourage people to look at facts and decide with their heads rather than out of fear. But last night, after crafting a reply and making it as diplomatic and tactful as I could, I just couldn't hit "Enter." The chance of being misinterpreted was too great. I pasted it into a private message instead. I tweaked it to be more personal and less general. I still couldn't send it. In my mind, it seemed far-fetched that my words would suddenly sway her, not even from her opinions, but just from her crusading battle tactics. Quite out of character, I decided that deleting the whole thing and letting it go seemed more like the loving thing to do.

This is all very weird for me.

I'm never at a loss for words. Refraining from having my thoughts like a rotating sprinkler head on full blast has really been more my problem in life. It's not like I've suddenly decided to stop talking. It's happening quite without my intervention. It seems to be step 2 in the process God is doing in my heart. The first step was beginning my education on pain (which you can read about by clicking HERE). Now it seems that He's literally taking away my ability to articulate a quick opinion about everything. I think this falls into the miracle category, seriously. If I can come up with one at all, I have doubts about expressing it. For the first time in my life, I'm experiencing what it's like to be truly slow to speak.

"Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person

be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger..." —James 1:19

Is it okay to be this quiet?

I think so. :) Social media create the opposite environment, making it easy for me to be anything but quiet. I think that as a society, we're getting to the point where we expect to hear about every dessert people make and every pumpkin their kids sit on. I'm certainly not saying that's a bad thing, and I enjoy the convenience of being able to reach so many friends so quickly. But from where I'm sitting, it's also starting to look like another way to talk without thinking. I'm starting to question, is what I'm about to say going to benefit anyone? The majority of the time, no. Is this a sign that I'm depressed and having low self-esteem? I don't think so. 

But I looked it up, just to make sure...

"When words are many, transgression is not lacking, 

but whoever restrains his lips is prudent." —Proverbs 10:19

"A fool takes no pleasure in understanding, 

but only in expressing his opinion." —Proverbs 18:2

And my personal favorite:

"Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, 

but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, 

that it may give grace to those who hear." —Ephesians 4:29

I combed through the Bible just to make sure there wasn't a verse in there about being entitled to my opinions or speaking often so that people can really know me. I got nothing. It was very un-American. It kept saying in various ways that I am created to know God and help others know Him, not me. And it also seemed to indicate that the more I say, the more potential I have for getting myself into trouble. I can certainly attest to that. I keep waiting for the sprinkler head to come back on and spew out all those opinions I used to be so proud of. I have no guarantee that it won't ever happen.

But it seems like the more I understand of God, the quieter I get.

...Leave me a comment! :D

The Grand Event

Years ago, a good friend asked me to be the music teacher at a little K-8 Christian school where he was the principal. I must have blacked out, or had a small fit of insanity that temporarily dispossessed me of my ability to think logically. Because when the meeting was over, I was nodding my head and shaking his hand while he explained my salary by muttering something about "Christian service." I was now a music teacher. 

How hard could it be, though?

I figured I'd teach the kindergarteners some music theory by drawing funny faces on a staff and handing out percussion instruments, hoping they didn't use each other's heads as cymbals. When that quit working, I'd remove my ear plugs and teach them hand motions to a song. They could later perform this dressed like sheep. How adorable would that be? I'd teach the 1st and 2nd graders how to play recorders so that by the end we could subject their parents to a chorus of semi-recognizable tunes played on what sounds like constipated teapots at full boil. I would teach the 3rd and 4th graders how to play hand bells, and just keep highlighting notes on the score and tapping my baton on the music stand until that feeling that I'm driving a truck through a wind chime factory started to dissipate. I'd teach the 5th graders to be dramatic… wait, no instruction needed there. Then I would teach the 6th, 7th, and 8th graders to be a choir, assuring them that it's okay to risk looking like an idiot in front of everybody. Thankfully, I lead by example really well in that area.

Every day, I went home mentally exhausted.

I remember my name being on the program as having directed 150-odd kids in TWO unified productions of full-costumed dramatic and musical splendor. Heck, there were even kids at the back doing sound and lights. To this day I don't think it should have said "Director" next to my name on that program. "Befuddled Ringleader" would have suited better.  I don't know how all those kids managed to get organized into that gorgeous, cohesive unit that made the parents cheer. What I saw during class didn't give me much reason to predict that outcome. What I didn't see was that God had a plan for those kids that year, and he had a plan for me that not even I could screw up. He went before me and cleared a path. He gave me just enough mayhem to bring me to my knees, but never push me over the edge. He sent parents and teachers and generous donors into my life who brought fullness and sparkle to my meager efforts. He shaped me into what was necessary for that time by lavishly supplying everything I needed, and even beyond. I went into almost every situation a clueless impostor and came out smelling like a rose. I was the cracked pot (or crackpot) that held water anyway. I was the crooked stick that drew straight lines. What I did at that school was impossible for me. That's why God was glorified. Only he could do all that. But that's biblical. 

"Whoever speaks [should do so] as one who speaks oracles of God; 

whoever serves, as one who serves by the strength that God supplies—

in order that in everything God may be glorified through Jesus Christ. 

To him belong glory and dominion forever and ever. Amen." —1 Peter 4:11

Am I saying that volunteering to do jobs for which you are uniquely unqualified is always the way to go? Hehe. NO. I'm saying that you should do everything by the strength that God supplies so he gets the glory. It's just more obvious that's happening when you're out of your depth. 

Want to see something freakishly fantastic about this verse? 

That word "supplies" up there? The Greek word used is "chorēgei." It means "funds and leads a chorus of performers, bearing all the expenses necessary to stage a grand event."  Are you freaking kidding me right now?! Amazing! Obviously, nobody knows better than God how much effort and expense goes into a theatrical production. When he "supplies," that's the level of supply we're talking about. God is so serious that his son Jesus be glorified in our lives, that he supplies us with everything we need to make our lives into a grand event that makes people say, "Wow, God did that?" He's not about spray glitter and cheap illusions. He sends in real tigers and lights the batons on fire! 

Well, I only lasted a year being a music teacher, but I'm still out of my depth. I'm a mom now.

And being a mom is a lot like directing a theatrical production. I am so encouraged that even though I'm still the Befuddled Ringleader, I have a heavenly Dad who not only leads my little chorus of performers, he completely funds my efforts with strength and creativity when I have none of my own. He makes this grand event I call my life a success. He even does special effects! The applause at the final curtain will be his.

                                                          Leave me a comment! :D

"Sometimes I Feel Ugly..."

My little Winkerbean just said that to me today.

"Sometimes I feel ugly, and I want to hide." My heart broke when I heard those words come out of that pretty little mouth. Those beautiful, perfect, cupid's bow lips that I used to steal kisses from when she was a sleeping infant were now speaking of ugliness. Her own ugliness? I realized two earth-shattering things at the same time.

First, my little girl isn't so little any more.

Little kids think about life inside their little universe. They delight in the tickle of ladybug feet across their palms. They chase bubbles. They are just beginning to understand that there are other people in the world besides themselves and their immediate family. I have yet to see a little kid who is self-conscious. Winkerbean isn't little. She's starting to consider how other people see her. She's going to be nine years old before I blink.

The second thing I realized was my ghastly mistake...

I'm horrified when I think about it. I have tried on clothes with a disgusted look on my face, muttering under my breath that I should just wear a potato sack instead, to hide my ugly body. I have yanked out gray hairs and bemoaned the fact that I'm getting old too soon and don't want to lose my pretty brunette locks. I have compared myself to others whom I find more attractive than myself and given in to discouragement... all while my daughter looks on and absorbs everything. And now, with tears streaming down my face, I realize what I've done. I've taught her that what she wears is for other people to see and appreciate. That getting older is not an honor, but a dreadful curse. That the way to tell if you're beautiful is to look around you and see how you compare.

I would never say those things to her. But I have... just not with words.

This is one more example of how the student becomes like the teacher. But this teacher has just repented. I know my loving heavenly Father is heartbroken to hear me utter words of ugliness... when I believe the lie that my beauty comes from the outside. Just as heartbroken as I am when my little girl says those things about herself. It sounds preposterous to me that my little girl feels ugly, but it is no less preposterous when I feel it. The truth is, God made us both, and he's the one who gets to decide what ugly is.

"I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. 

Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well." —Psalm 139:4

I'm not on the ugly list. Maybe I am to some people, but not to my Creator.

"For the LORD sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, 

but the LORD looks on the heart.” —1 Samuel 16:7b

I'm so sorry, little Winkerbean. I made a mistake, and I was so wrong. I AM beautiful... because God made me that way. I forgot that. God help me, I need to be a better example of that from now on. You are a breathtaking, lovely girl, inside and out, because God made you that way. You have a beautiful smile, a beautiful mind, and a beautiful heart. Don't ever hide that.

This Is the Day

We hear this verse by itself a lot. 

We hear people sing it in a song, or say it to someone else who's looking a little mopey. We mutter it under our breath when the baby's crying, a pot's boiling over, and we've just dropped an entire plate of spaghetti on the floor. It's almost a way of saying, "I hate this day, I can't handle it, but I'm supposed to have a good attitude. So I'm going to put on a smile and remind myself that I should be happy right now, because God put me in this situation!" We also see this verse plastered over breathtaking photos of God's creation and made into cute little fridge magnets. The mistaken and dangerous notion that crops up is, "cheer up, because God's creation is pretty to look at. Check out this sunrise or those daisies. Now, don't you feel better?  Every day is a great day, simply because God made it." 

 Yeah, that'll cheer you right up. Or not.

It's true that every day is a day that God has made. And it's also true that we are told to be glad when trials come our way… not necessarily "glad" to be going through them, but glad that God is using them to make us more like Jesus. But some days we just don't feel like rejoicing and being glad. Nobody feels glad when they lose their job, their marriage, or their child. Nobody felt like rejoicing when our country was attacked and thousands of innocent people died fiery deaths in the World Trade Center towers. Especially since Scripture is clear that there is "a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance," is this verse really saying that we're required daily to rejoice and be glad?

I don't think so. 

If you get out your Hebrew dictionary (because everybody's got one), and look up this little word for "made," you'll see the meaning it was trying to get across: "accomplished."  This is the day the Lord has accomplished? That sounds a bit bigger than just making a day happen. It sounds like he was busy… but doing what? Let's back up and read it again, only with the four verses that come before it: 

This is the gate of the LORD;

the righteous shall enter through it.

I thank you that you have answered me

and have become my salvation.

The stone that the builders rejected

has become the cornerstone.

This is the LORD’s doing;

it is marvelous in our eyes.

This is the day that the LORD has made;

let us rejoice and be glad in it.

Did you catch it? Did you figure out what day we're actually celebrating?

If you're still waking up, I'll help you out. Think about this part… "This is the gate of the Lord; the righteous shall enter through it." The gate? THE Gate? As in the gate mentioned in John 10:9? 

"I [Jesus] am the gate; whoever enters through me will be saved."

Now consider the next part… "The stone that the builders rejected has become the cornerstone." THE Cornerstone? As in, the cornerstone mentioned all over the Bible, such as in Acts 4:11? 

"This Jesus is the stone that was rejected by you, the builders, which has become the cornerstone." 

This Psalm is all about Jesus saving us!

Jesus is the gate, the only way to God. He is our cornerstone. He answers our prayers. The day he made us righteous by giving us his righteousness, the day he became our salvation… that really WAS marvelous! What a staggering accomplishment on his part! That's something worth rejoicing over!

So even though those days will come when you're stuck in situations that make you feel hopeless, you don't have to try to fake happiness in the midst of those times. Because you have something better instead, something truly worth celebrating… the day the Lord accomplished your rescue. Let us rejoice and be glad in THAT!

How Jesus Is Our Stick in the Mud

This Complete Breakfast - Day 5 

Thanks for joining the Short People and me for our morning discussion! Look for more discussions under the "This Complete Breakfast" tab if you'd like to follow along with organized links rather than scrolling through posts. ;)

"I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, 

he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing." —John 15:5

We have several grapevines in our yard... 

This verse makes so much sense when we think about the way the grapevines grow. Before there were ever any grapes, or even any branches or leaves, there had to grow that thick vine at the center. It's the oldest and strongest part of the plant, and it never moves from that spot. It brings the life-giving water and nutrients up from the soil. The sap flows from it into the crazy, young branches that go shooting out all over the place. During spring and early summer, the grape plant quadruples in size as the branches seem to take on a life of their own, changing almost by the hour. It's hard to believe, when you push back all that thick foliage, that it's actually that humble little stick in the mud, covered in crusty bark, that's feeding life to all those fancy leaves and loads of heavy, plump grapes. One of those branches might even grow so long that it winds its way several yards through the tangle of branches until it's clear across the grape arbor from where it started!  But if you were to take a pair of shears and cut that branch off from the vine, you would soon know which one it was, because every leaf and every grape along that branch would die. Without that humble little stick, there would be no fruit. There would be no grape arbor at all. 

It's just like that with us and Jesus.

He is that humble beginning to God's family. He is the Firstborn of God, and all the rest of us grow out of him because of his life-giving presence. God's family has grown fast, just like the grape arbor does every year, but every single one of us can trace our lives back to Jesus. He's the one who created us and continues to sustain us, hold us up, and make it so we can bear fruit. We are his branches. 

What does it mean to abide in him?

Simply put, to abide means to stay. It means to not allow anything to get in the way of our connection to him. We can stay connected to him by talking to him all throughout the day, and by looking into his Word like we're doing right now. It can also mean that if something gets between us and Jesus, to make it right. That might mean confessing sin and apologizing to him, forsaking that choice and deciding to obey him from now on. It might mean giving up something that makes it harder for us to worship Jesus. If we don't have time for him because we're playing too many games or have too many distractions, it's time to give up those distractions. We need that time with Jesus to keep allowing his life to flow through us and help us bear fruit. 

He abides in us too? What does that mean?

It means he stays with us! He keeps pure, unbroken fellowship with us. He promised that he would never leave us, but that the Holy Spirit would make his home in us and continue to be a constant influence on us. He continues to lift us up, speak to us, and help us get rid of sin in our lives. This is like the water and nutrients that flow from the vine into the branches and produce all those fat, juicy grapes. His life flows into us and produces in us love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self control.  

None of that happens without Jesus. Just like there are no branches or grapes without the vine. 

Temptations Are God's Idea?

This Complete Breakfast - Day 4

This is part of a series of morning discussions I have with my sweet girlies before school. Feel free to join us, pass it on to a friend, or leave us a comment. I hope you have a blessed day!

No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he 

will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide 

the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it. —1 Corinthians 10:13

Imagine that you're sitting in school and your teacher hands out a test. 

On this test are questions about everything you've been taught so far. The number of questions you get right on this test will show how much you've really learned, and how much you've forgotten. Also imagine that right next to you is the answer key. You know, the teacher's book where all the answers are written in pink? It's sitting right there. All you have to do to get 100% on the test is open that book and look at the answers. All you have to do is cheat.

The "temptation" that this verse is talking about can be both of those things. 

Sometimes it can be like a test… a test that shows how strong your faith is, or how well you obey God when he asks you to do something hard (that's known as character). Other times it can be an enticement to sin, where you have to make a choice between right and wrong.  When does temptation happen? When people around us are sinning. When something bad or scary happens. When what's easiest isn't always what's best. This is hard stuff! There will be both tests and chances to sin, and we have to make a choice how we will respond with our attitudes and actions. How are we going to manage it?

This verse is reassuring, because it tells us three great things. 

1. There isn't a single test or sin choice that hasn't already happened to somebody else. 

Many other people are facing the same hard choices we face. In fact, the Bible even tells us that Jesus himself was tempted in all of the same things, but never sinned. What a great comfort that Jesus knows exactly what we're going through!

2. God won't ever make you face a temptation that is too hard to overcome. 

That means he won't put a 12th grade exam in front of you if you're only in third grade! It also means that you won't be too baffled to make the right call when it comes down to whether to sin or obey. The right choice will be clear. Even if you don't have the strength by yourself to do the right thing, he will give you the power to do it.

3.   There will always be an escape route out of trouble. 

God will provide you with a new destination, a path that takes you in the right direction, away from sin and away from danger… toward success.

Temptations—both tests and chances to sin—don't have to turn out badly. They are God's idea, for our good! Like a great teacher and Dad, God isn't just going to fill our heads with nice facts about himself and how great it is to obey him. He's going to give us chances to try them out in obedience, to see that they really work. This increases our faith in him. Don't be scared of temptation and trials. These can be awesome times that bring great glory to God! 

To Hear My Name

Mr. Boy is almost two. 

He's in that charming stage when the vocabulary is expanding by the day while the pronunciation is adorably inaccurate. He's learning all the words he finds important first…  Tea (which is any drinkable liquid). Eat. Dump Truck. He knows many, many words that he can't yet say, but he can point to them. And for every word he needs but doesn't know, there's always a sound effect to fall back on. 

He's got his family members all sorted out.

His sisters are "SeeSee" and "Didi" and they go on the "rrrrrrrRRRRRrrmmmmththbtbtbt!!!" every day to school. "Dah-ee" puts on his "shew" and his "hatch" and goes out to fly his "sssssshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhffffffhheewwwwwwwww!!!" Everyone's sorted out. 

Everyone except me.

Mr. Boy doesn't say my name. He doesn't say "mama" or even "mah." He doesn't seem to know what to call me. 

The other day, The Captain asked him, "Do you want to go for a bike ride?

"Yeah!" he cheered.

"Okay, can you say bye-bye to Mommy?"

He blew a kiss. "Bye-bye, Dump Truck."

I guess I should feel pretty special since dump trucks are THE best thing ever in his mind.

We do baby roll call occasionally to see if he can say all of our names. The Captain points to each of us and says, "Who's that?" Mr. Boy will say each name in turn. He'll even point to himself and say "Beebee!" 

Then The Captain points to me and says, "Who's that?" 

Mr. Boy smiles. "Wassat?"

"This is Daddy. Now who is this?"

Another smile. "Kweekwee bastutat!"

"No, this is Mama. Can you say, 'Mama'?"

Huge smile this time. "Dubai! Wee-shweebee-dat!" 

"No. MAHH-MA." The Captain enunciates slowly while pointing at me.

"BEEEEE-BEE." Mr. Boy mimics in the slow drawl while pointing at himself. 

I look into his big blue eyes. "Buddy, don't you want to say, 'Mama'?"

He leaps into my arms and says "Awwwwww." He hugs my neck and pats my hair with his grubby little palms. I'll take it.

What is it about this, though? Why does it matter to me so much?

I know my little guy loves me. I see it in the smiles and the hugs. I see it when he drags out a huge board book and backs into my lap. I see it when he looks intently into my face after I've been crying and strokes my cheek, earnestly assuring me that "we tree ba tabba tot, she kweekweesheeshee." I appreciate that. Especially since it's so true. 

But I want to hear him say my name. 

It's not that I'm dissatisfied with my son. I love him to pieces no matter what he calls me. I wouldn't love him more if he got this right. It's just a hole that will have to wait to be filled. It's a tiny hole with a tiny sadness inside it, but it's there. And that sadness isn't being wasted, because I think I just understood something about God my Father…

He loves to hear me say his name. In fact, he asks me to!

Oh give thanks to the LORD; call upon his name;

make known his deeds among the peoples!

Sing to him, sing praises to him;

tell of all his wondrous works!

Glory in his holy name;

let the hearts of those who seek the LORD rejoice!

Psalm 105:1-3

The name of the LORD is a strong tower;

the righteous man runs into it and is safe.

Proverbs 18:10

Ascribe to the Lord the glory due his name;

worship the Lord in the splendor of his holiness.

Psalm 29:2

The name of the Lord is a big deal in the Bible, and rightly so. 

We should call on his name, often and loudly. Because it's a wonderful name, deserving of praise. Because it's a safe place to rest our hearts. Because he deserves it. And, I think, because he loves to hear his children say his name. I'm going to go say his name to him right now... because now I know how much it will warm his heart.  

The Evil Queen Attitude

This Complete Breakfast - Day 3

Here's another morning Bible discussion designed for kiddos. Praying you have a blessed day. :)

“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility 

consider others better than yourselves.” --Philippians 2:3

What is selfish ambition?

Having ambition means wanting something and being ready to work hard to get it. Having ambition isn’t always a bad thing. It can help you reach a goal. It’s when it becomes selfish that it becomes a sin. Being selfish means you care about yourself more than anyone else. If you have selfish ambition, that means you want to get your own way, even if it hurts other people. You might say things like, “Move out of my way!”

What is vain conceit?

If we act vain, it means that we worry too much about what other people think of us. It means we want others to think we are talented and good-looking, and we might feel pretty upset if they don’t. Being conceited means thinking we are amazing in every way. Everyone has their faults, but if we’re conceited, we have a hard time seeing our faults.

Remember the evil queen in the story of Snow White?

Now there’s somebody full of selfish ambition and vain conceit! She wanted to be the most beautiful in all the land, and worried so much about others thinking she was beautiful that she was willing to kill! She only cared about herself and getting what she wanted, and she did some pretty terrible things in order to be seen as the best. Her attitude was so dangerous that it made her downright evil!

This verse warns us that having the same attitude is also dangerous for us. We might not be polishing a poisoned apple for anyone, but we still might be hurting others by:

• Insisting that our way is better
• Not letting others go first
• Being unwilling to share with others
• Spending so much time thinking about ourselves that we don’t notice that others need help

...and worst of all,

• Focusing on ourselves so much that people don’t want to hear about Jesus because they don’t want to be anything like us!

What’s the answer? How can we avoid having this awful attitude?

The last part of the verse gives us a clue: “...but in humility consider others better than yourselves.” IS everyone else better than you are? Is that what God thinks? Hmmm. That’s not the right question. The truth is, it doesn’t really matter. God simply asks us to consider others better than ourselves. That means treat them better and love them more than we do ourselves. That’s a sure way to keep us from becoming evil villains full of selfish ambition and vain conceit!

How To Be A Geyser

This Complete Breakfast - Day 2

Here's today's breakfast discussion with my Short People. You'll find the links to other discussions in the "This Complete Breakfast" tab at the top. :) 

"Keep your heart with all vigilance, for 

from it flow the springs of life." —Proverbs 4:23

What is a spring?

In this case, it's not a Slinky or a season of the year. It's water, shooting up from the ground! It keeps on flowing, toward the plants, animals, and people around it. If it's good, clean water, then that's a really great thing for living things. They get to drink it and grow big and healthy. 

But what happens if pollution gets into the spring? 

Then pollution goes into the water, and it gets all over everything! Everyone who drinks or even touches that water will get sick! Even a little bit of pollution in the water isn't good, because it can cause sickness that nobody notices for a long time. 

How could someone keep the spring from being polluted?

They would have to protect that spring! They'd have to tell people, "Hey, you can't dump that garbage here, there's fresh water coming out!" They might need to build a fence around the spring to keep animals from pooping in it. They might build a sign to let people know not to swim there. How else could they protect the spring? Are they being mean by making rules to protect the spring? No. They're being kind, because they're trying to keep everyone healthy with clean water. 

This verse tells us that our hearts are like that spring, and need just as much protection!

When Jesus comes to live in our hearts, he gives us new hearts—He starts the spring of fresh, clean water flowing out—and makes us more like him. Our hearts are where he tells us to hide his word, so we can remember it. Our hearts are where we make choices about our behavior… whether they are good choices or bad. The words that we say, and the attitudes we show others are like the water flowing out of our spring. Our words land on others and can bring them life and help them grow. If we let our hearts get polluted by bad ideas, bad thoughts, mean attitudes, or even movies or songs that aren't good for us, those ideas and thoughts are going to come out onto others through our words.

What are some bad attitudes, thoughts, or TV shows that might cause pollution in your heart?

The Bible tells us to protect our hearts from those things.  Part of a parent's job is to help protect your heart... we might do that by making rules for you that act like fences to keep the pollution out.  That way, what comes out of us is good for us and for others!

Photo credit: Wikipedia.org, Castle Geyser

This Complete Breakfast

My two girlies are going back to school today! Waaaahhhhh!!!

It'll just be Mr. Boy and me together all day long, shuttling dinosaurs around in dump trucks, wondering how Winkerbean and Sweet Pea are faring. I'm probably more nervous and excited than they are. What freaks me out the most is that my little sprouts are coming out of the greenhouse and going out into the unpredictable weather of public school. I don't know what they'll see or hear. I don't know if the other kids will like them or pick on them. They could come home with weird ideas! Or… they might just have a great time and learn some stuff. Who can really say?

Time to claim Philippians 4:6-7 one more time. 

"…do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.  And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

Because guess what… and I'm speaking mostly to myself right now (The Captain has learned never to interrupt me when myself and I are talking)—my little sprouts have got to leave the protection of the greenhouse sometime and start to put down roots; and they're going to come into contact with dirt! Healthy dirt, yucky dirt. All kinds of experiences, even negative ones, are part of shaping them into mature and fruitful people. 

I can't control everything that happens to them.

But I can do my part to prepare them. I can do more than make them the most delectable peanut butter-and-honey sandwiches and write their names in a rainbow of Sharpie colors on every pencil box, folder, eraser, and crayon (yes I did). I can pray for them. I can pray with them. I can pray over them. And I can feed them a good breakfast of carbs, protein, and Scripture.  

I'm going to let you in on our breakfast discussions, as I ask the Holy Spirit to provide me with just a little takeaway that I can give them during breakfast each day. I pray that God will impress the truth of that Scripture upon their hearts as they go about their school day. Even the public schools have realized that kids function much better when they start the day with balanced nourishment. As a result, the schools in our district—maybe yours too—are now serving a breakfast to each child every day, even the ones who've already eaten at home! (I'm going to refrain from venturing my opinion on whether they've actually achieved "balanced nourishment" because that isn't the point.) Even more than physical food, I feel strongly that spiritual food is so important for my Short People. 

Look for our discussions under the "This Complete Breakfast" tab if you'd like to follow the organized links rather than scrolling through posts. ;) And if mornings aren't your thing, they make good bedtime conversations too. I love breakfast at night! My kidlets are elementary school age, so the discussions are based on that maturity level. Of course, feel free to adapt them to your kids! I hope you find them useful. Don't be shy… pass them on if they're a blessing to you. And I love to read your comments!

Here's Day 1, about one of our favorite verses... Joshua 1:9. I thought it fitting to discuss fear on the first day of school!

"This is my command--be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the LORD your God is with you wherever you go." —Joshua 1:9

What does it mean to be courageous?

It doesn't mean not having fear. It means being willing to face your fear, because you know there's something bigger than what you're afraid of.

Did you know that even Jesus was afraid sometimes? The night before he died on the cross, he prayed and asked God his Father if there was some other way to save people from their sin. He asked if God would change his mind and not make him go through the pain of dying. But God didn't change his mind. He wanted Jesus to go through with it, because his love for us was bigger than his fear of being in pain. So he faced the cross, and he beat death! He won!

What are you afraid of today?

God can help you be courageous and face that fear. He may not take away your fear, but he will give you the strength to go through it. Is it because you are suddenly going to become strong? No. It's because HE is with you, wherever you go. At the end, you'll be able to say, "I was able to be brave because God was with me and helped me."

The Curse

There's a joke on my side of the family…

We call it "The Curse." It began with my grandmother, who, worn down by witty comebacks, told her young daughter in a fit of exasperation, "Someday you're going to have a daughter and she's going to be just LIKE YOU!" To begin with, stories about my grandmother's humor are legendary and retold to this day. She had a sort of warped, random humor that gave her a love of poetry such as this: 

Starkle, starkle, little twink,

Who the heck you are, I think?

I'm not under the ocfluence of inkahol,

Although some thinkle peep I are!

Oh I fool so feelish, I don't know who is me,

And the drunker I stand here, the longer I get.

Grandma was the one who would be going about her day and randomly say things like, "'BALLS!' cried the queen. 'If I had two, I'd be king!'" She was also the one who loved to retell the story of the time she went to the store and couldn't find the Tampax. The cashier called the stock boy over the intercom (yes, the whole store could hear) and asked him to bring some Tampax up to the check stand, but he misunderstood. Thinking she was asking for tacks, he called back over the intercom and asked, "Is that the kind you push in with your thumb, or pound in with a hammer?"

My mother, who is also a bit warped and random, adds punny to the mix for good measure. Her particular brand of humor is a charming, self-deprecating kind of humor. She doesn't mind being the punchline sometimes, and she calls things as she sees them. (For example, dining room light fixtures are not "chandeliers" in our family, they're "table hats.") 

"The Curse" apparently came true when I was born. 

I am JUST like my mother. Although it seems with every generation, a new facet of humor develops. I've taken my grandma's warped randomness, combined with my mother's punniness, then added my own cerebral brand of dryness and an odd (rarely helpful) ability to memorize one-liners to it all. Lord, help me. And one day during my childhood, my mother, worn down by my witty comebacks, told me in a fit of exasperation, "Someday you're going to have a daughter and she's going to be just LIKE YOU!" When Winkerbean was born, I thought I'd escaped. She's just like her daddy. 

But then Sweet Pea was born.

This girl is such a character! She describes being sick as when "your fever is sticking out and your nose is gone." She steps on the scale and says, "I'm just going to weigh my feet." And she threatens her sister with zingers like, "If you don't quit being bossy to me, God is going to turn you into salad dressing!" But is she really just like me? Everyone else says so. That scares me a little, because I realize more and more that it isn't just my humor that I'm passing on. 

"A disciple is not above his teacher, but everyone when he is fully trained 

will be like his teacher." —Luke 6:40

This verse tells me that I've got little disciples in my house, and when they're fully trained, each one of them will be like me in some way, family "curse" or not. By watching me, are they learning… 

• Not to take themselves too seriously?
• To have a gracious attitude toward others who inconvenience or wrong them?
• To open their Bibles and let God speak to their hearts on a regular basis?
• To persevere in prayer, even through the tough and boring parts of life?
• To put Jesus first before any other earthly loves?

I could get really freaked out about whether I'm a good enough example. But I'm not going to. Why? Because I'm going to screw it up regularly and have to repent before God and my kids. I'm going to have to let them know I've sinned and that by God's grace I'm becoming more and more like Jesus each day. I'm also not going to worry because we're told in Scripture not to be anxious about anything; but in everything, by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving, let our requests be made known to God. (Philippians 4:6) So I thank God for my Short People. I thank God for the weighty responsibility given to The Captain and me to disciple their little hearts. And I ask the Lord to begin his good work in them and bring it to completion himself, so that He, not I, will get the glory for that. 

And the next time Sweet Pea cracks a joke about broken automobiles needing a "CAR-o-practor," I'm just going to hug her and say, "Someday I hope you have a daughter who's just like you."

MEMO: The Sabbath has been moved

Something occurred to me the other day...

I was feeling guilty about not reading my Bible more often. I know I should. I even have one in the bathroom! I began to consider WHY I don't read my Bible more often. I got introspective for awhile, asking the Holy Spirit to reveal to me some sort of epiphany. Was I believing in lies about the Bible, that made me shy away from reading it? Was God mad at me for not reading it?

Then I got a pang of guilt (not the healthy kind) and a little voice whispered, "How can you expect God to just show you stuff out of thin air, just at random, when you haven't been reading your Bible? You MUST read your Bible, because THAT is how he will talk to you, not with you sitting there on the pot, trying to have some lazy conversation with him. You do your part, and only THEN will he do his. If you expect God's favor, you have to work for it, lady!" 

Okay.  Just typing that out makes me angry!  There are tiny fragments of truth in there, but they were twisted into a lie, right there while I was asking God to reveal lies!  Yes, God DOES speak through Scripture, quite awesomely. I ran across Hebrews 4:12, which says, "For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart." So of course, reading the Bible is quite an ideal way to hear from God, keep his truth straight in my mind, and let him reveal to me what's in my heart. 

But God has NO limits to how he speaks, or when. He revealed to me that I have avoided Him, tragically, out of guilt because I hadn't read his "love letter" lately.  I would find myself completely unsurprised that I couldn't seem to hear his voice. Of course he wouldn't talk to ME. Why should he, when I forget to talk to him?  Y'know what? That is such a lie.

He speaks to whom he will, in any way he chooses. 

It's not based on some pious act of seeking him with just the right formula of prayer and Scripture reading. He talks to me often, and I don't need to worry about him going silent when I forget to read my Bible.

I thought a little longer about it, and it dawned on me that I believed the Bible is boring. That's right, boring. Even those translations that change the "thou shalt nots" into "don'ts." Just being really honest here, but maybe you can relate: I could read a few verses to pass the time while sitting on the pot, but beyond that… meh.  When I do pick it up, it's usually to find something, or out of a sense of guilt or duty. 

The Holy Spirit interrupted this train of thought by bringing to mind the phrase, "the word of God is living and active..." but I had to Google it because I had already forgotten where I'd heard that lately… Yeah, guess where it was? Hebrews 4:12 again. Chills, anyone? 

Living. Active. That doesn't sound boring...

I ended up reading the entire 4th chapter of Hebrews (it's short enough to read while my 2-year-old bangs on the bathroom door, so you have time to go read it too!) and it just blew my mind.  It talks about the Israelites who, in their pride, refused to obey God and therefore didn't enter his rest. It directly correlates to the Sabbath rest that God declared for himself on the 7th day, and then there's a memo to believers: 

The Sabbath has been moved. It will now be celebrated on a different day... it's called Today.  

So if it's "today," then God has declared that I rest from my works. Not the laundry and dishes kind of works, unfortunately, but the spiritual kind of works. Like reading my Bible to make God love me enough to talk to me. Like praying more to earn his favor. If his new Sabbath rest is always TODAY, that means that if I work for my salvation, like, EVER again, I am in disobedience like the Israelites. God is not angered by my failures, he's angered by my prideful efforts to earn his favor and righteousness. Think of that! 

Then he goes on in Hebrews 4 to describe his word as being living and active... that is, Jesus the Word! (Check out John 1:1- "In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.") Jesus is the one who brings the words of Scripture to life and gives them meaning and context. It's not just the Bible, it's Jesus! He is the one who divides even my soul and spirit, and shows my heart and thoughts for what they are. He is the great High Priest who empathizes with my every weakness. It is he who got me that great framework of grace to come before God and enter his rest. That is not boring, that is mind-blowing! Satan wants me to see THAT as a dusty, antiquated book that I "ought" to read out of guilt, when really it's the fabric of the freaking' universe!

I could go on, but I really need to absorb this right now. God showed up and really showed me,

"Not only am I not boring, but I am your living, active ANSWER! You already have my love and approval, so enter my rest!"