Slow To Speak

I have had so little to say lately.  See the starfish?  Self portrait.

My last blog post was over two weeks ago, but each time I've attempted to put some thoughts down since then, I've found I really don't have anything that original to say. I imagine you, dear reader, skimming halfway through it and realizing you just wasted five minutes of your day reading something that numerous others have already said in some form.

I can't think of much to share on Facebook either. 

My status updates are half as numerous, and they're mostly about my kids. I change my mind and delete about 90% of the comments I'm about to post, because I'm not convinced that they'll actually make anybody's day better.  Someone in my friend list posted an emotional plea yesterday, trying to persuade others to agree with her about a hot-button parenting issue. I'm not one for arguing just for the sake of arguing, especially about issues like this one, but quite often I'll chime in and encourage people to look at facts and decide with their heads rather than out of fear. But last night, after crafting a reply and making it as diplomatic and tactful as I could, I just couldn't hit "Enter." The chance of being misinterpreted was too great. I pasted it into a private message instead. I tweaked it to be more personal and less general. I still couldn't send it. In my mind, it seemed far-fetched that my words would suddenly sway her, not even from her opinions, but just from her crusading battle tactics. Quite out of character, I decided that deleting the whole thing and letting it go seemed more like the loving thing to do.

This is all very weird for me.

I'm never at a loss for words. Refraining from having my thoughts like a rotating sprinkler head on full blast has really been more my problem in life. It's not like I've suddenly decided to stop talking. It's happening quite without my intervention. It seems to be step 2 in the process God is doing in my heart. The first step was beginning my education on pain (which you can read about by clicking HERE). Now it seems that He's literally taking away my ability to articulate a quick opinion about everything. I think this falls into the miracle category, seriously. If I can come up with one at all, I have doubts about expressing it. For the first time in my life, I'm experiencing what it's like to be truly slow to speak.

"Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person

be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger..." —James 1:19

Is it okay to be this quiet?

I think so. :) Social media create the opposite environment, making it easy for me to be anything but quiet. I think that as a society, we're getting to the point where we expect to hear about every dessert people make and every pumpkin their kids sit on. I'm certainly not saying that's a bad thing, and I enjoy the convenience of being able to reach so many friends so quickly. But from where I'm sitting, it's also starting to look like another way to talk without thinking. I'm starting to question, is what I'm about to say going to benefit anyone? The majority of the time, no. Is this a sign that I'm depressed and having low self-esteem? I don't think so. 

But I looked it up, just to make sure...

"When words are many, transgression is not lacking, 

but whoever restrains his lips is prudent." —Proverbs 10:19

"A fool takes no pleasure in understanding, 

but only in expressing his opinion." —Proverbs 18:2

And my personal favorite:

"Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, 

but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, 

that it may give grace to those who hear." —Ephesians 4:29

I combed through the Bible just to make sure there wasn't a verse in there about being entitled to my opinions or speaking often so that people can really know me. I got nothing. It was very un-American. It kept saying in various ways that I am created to know God and help others know Him, not me. And it also seemed to indicate that the more I say, the more potential I have for getting myself into trouble. I can certainly attest to that. I keep waiting for the sprinkler head to come back on and spew out all those opinions I used to be so proud of. I have no guarantee that it won't ever happen.

But it seems like the more I understand of God, the quieter I get.

...Leave me a comment! :D

The Embrace of Pain

I had my body stolen when I was twelve. 

No, it wasn't alien abduction. Although that would be pretty cool if it meant I could ride in a Tardis. Never mind if you don't get that, just shake your head at me and move on. :) What I mean is, since I was about twelve years old, I've suffered from a chronic pain condition that is difficult to treat and poorly understood by most doctors.  In the past, I've likened it to having my Ferrari stolen and being given a rusty jalopy in which to hobble to life's finish line.  The idea of waking up each morning refreshed and energetic completely mystifies me. I'm usually reaching for pain pills and adding up time fragments to figure out how many hours of sleep I actually got. By the end of the day, it's easier to name body parts that don't hurt. And though I'm exhausted, I find it difficult to fall asleep in less than two hours. 

Maybe you can relate.

Realistically speaking, this condition isn't really curable for most people. I've prayed for healing. Years ago, a well-meaning friend encouraged me to "claim" verses like Psalm 103:3 (The Lord is the one who forgives all your iniquity and heals all your diseases.) I was so convinced for a while that God would heal my body completely if I just believed he would and asked with a pure heart. The truth is, God can do whatever he wants with his pots of clay. I have no right to "claim" the fulfillment of his promises in my own way and time. I have to wait for his best for me. But that's another blog post. For now, the bottom line seems to remain the same: 

Pain is going to be a big part of my life. Here's part of the reason I think that:

"So to keep me from becoming conceited because of the surpassing greatness 

of the revelations, a thorn was given me in the flesh, a messenger of Satan 

to harass me, to keep me from becoming conceited. Three times I pleaded with the Lord 

about this, that it should leave me. But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, 

for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of 

my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 

For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong." --2 Corinthians 12:7-10

Please understand, I am in NO way comparing myself to the great apostle Paul. I haven't been dealing with the "surpassing greatness" of any major revelations lately, except that butternut squash purée can go into just about any recipe. But I still need to be humbled.  And like Paul, physical pain is one way my heavenly Father chooses to accomplish that. Another reason I know I'm supposed to be in pain is that I didn't choose it, yet it's still here.

If you've read my blog for any length of time, you might have discovered I'm a mom. For Approximately half that time, I'm a single mom because my hubby The Captain is off flying planes. Don't get me wrong. I love our lifestyle because when he's home, he's usually home for days. But that means I have to find a way to function when I'm alone with three Short People.    

I have asked God, if he won't heal me, to at least show me how to get better... 

Juicing? Nutritional therapy? Supplements? Drugs? See a chiropractor? Get a massage? (The answer to that last one is always a yes, by the way.) But this is an area where the Lord has been pretty quiet and is asking me to trust him. I've tried all sorts of lifestyle modifications and therapies, with some limited improvements. If you have a theory, I've probably already heard it. And, I have been taking pain meds on and off for about seven years, just to function. And ya know what, they help. They help a LOT. 

And that is now my big, fat dilemma.

If you know anything about prescription pain meds, you know they start to lose their effectiveness unless you keep switching up or increasing your dose. That seemed fine to me, because it was working for the moment. I wasn't really looking beyond the next year or two. But I just got a big wake up call over the weekend. There was a bunch of complication and drama that arose and my refill didn't come when I was expecting it to. I was forced into full-on cold turkey mode. And then I realized…

This is only going to get harder. 

If I think this sucks now, just wait till I've been on these drugs another ten years and my body doesn't know what to do without them. What if I live till I'm 90? Do I really expect another 55+ years of playing this game to work out well? Sounds like a winding, crooked path to me. I think that, without realizing it, I had begun to allow myself to see those pain meds as life-giving. They made me feel and act like a normal person. But I'm not a normal person. I'm a person whom God has chosen for pain in order to bring glory to himself. And those drugs aren't life-giving, they're actually pretty hard on my body. They're great for short-term situations and I'd use them in a heartbeat for that, but this is different. It is not God's will for me that I destroy my body for a few hours' respite each day. And it's definitely not his will that I look to another savior. Because my life's purpose is not to run from the weight of pain in search of temporary fixes, as if I'm convinced that God won't really be enough to sustain what he has created to enable me to do what he's asked.

I don't know what the answer is right now. 

I don't know what life is like any more without pain drugs to help me cope. Quite honestly, I'm a bit freaked out at the idea. It won't be a Sunday afternoon picnic, but I'm more concerned about missing what God has for me, just because I wanted my life to be easy. I know what he's asking, and I know he's calling me to stop fearing pain, but instead embrace it so that he can meet me there. 

"Therefore lift your drooping hands and strengthen your weak knees, 

and make straight paths for your feet, so that what is lame may not be put out of joint 

but rather be healed." —Hebrews 12:12-13

Leave me a comment! :D

The Loving Touch

I'm on my third go-around with a toddler.

Kid 3.0 is a budding almost-two-year-old (my very firstest Mr. Boy) who is the human equivalent of Jell-O. I love that kid. The process of getting each child to elementary age in one piece teaches me something new every time.  With my first child, I learned that car seats work best when buckled down with a seatbelt. One day in the car, she was making a weird little squeaky noise I'd never heard before. When I looked behind me, I realized it was because she was getting to experience her very first time being upside down since the womb. Let me just say though, those car seat handles make awesome roll bars. Do not try this at home.

With my second child, I learned that the outcome is precisely the same whether you sterilize the dropped pacifier before giving it back, or whether you just lick it off and rub it on your pant leg… actually nothing happens. She never exploded!

Another thing I keep noticing is that toddlers mimic what their parents do. 

This can be good, bad, or hilarious. Like when I'm going all Jackie Chan with a fly swatter and yelling, "Die, bugs! Die!!" and I hear a little voice behind me holler, "DIE!!! DIE!!" while the child maniacally smacks the floor. Or when we're in traffic and someone honks a horn somewhere, and a child in my back seat yells, "What is WITH you people??"

But lately I've also been getting to experience again how sweet it can be.

I went to the doctor for a checkup today, and Mr. Boy came with me. While the nurse took my vitals, he watched her like a hawk. When the blood pressure cuff went on, he laid his baby soft hand protectively on my other arm and looked at me with concerned question in his eyes. "It's okay, Buddy," I reassured him. After the nurse left the room, he toddled over to the counter, climbed up on the padded bench next to it, and snagged a tissue from the box. He proceeded to dab my forehead, the corners of my mouth, my eyes, and my cheeks with it, all while whispering sweet little babbles of loving care three inches from my face. I relished the sweet scent of his graham cracker breath and baby shampooed hair. Then he sat in my lap and patted my shoulder for a while. After we got home, we played in his room for a few minutes before his nap. He covered me with his blankie, and mimicking the exact process by which I always put him to bed, he spoke his babyish blessing over me and stroked my hair with his little hand. 

When Jesus said that the kingdom of God belongs to such as these, he wasn't kidding!

Leave me a comment! :D

The Grand Event

Years ago, a good friend asked me to be the music teacher at a little K-8 Christian school where he was the principal. I must have blacked out, or had a small fit of insanity that temporarily dispossessed me of my ability to think logically. Because when the meeting was over, I was nodding my head and shaking his hand while he explained my salary by muttering something about "Christian service." I was now a music teacher. 

How hard could it be, though?

I figured I'd teach the kindergarteners some music theory by drawing funny faces on a staff and handing out percussion instruments, hoping they didn't use each other's heads as cymbals. When that quit working, I'd remove my ear plugs and teach them hand motions to a song. They could later perform this dressed like sheep. How adorable would that be? I'd teach the 1st and 2nd graders how to play recorders so that by the end we could subject their parents to a chorus of semi-recognizable tunes played on what sounds like constipated teapots at full boil. I would teach the 3rd and 4th graders how to play hand bells, and just keep highlighting notes on the score and tapping my baton on the music stand until that feeling that I'm driving a truck through a wind chime factory started to dissipate. I'd teach the 5th graders to be dramatic… wait, no instruction needed there. Then I would teach the 6th, 7th, and 8th graders to be a choir, assuring them that it's okay to risk looking like an idiot in front of everybody. Thankfully, I lead by example really well in that area.

Every day, I went home mentally exhausted.

I remember my name being on the program as having directed 150-odd kids in TWO unified productions of full-costumed dramatic and musical splendor. Heck, there were even kids at the back doing sound and lights. To this day I don't think it should have said "Director" next to my name on that program. "Befuddled Ringleader" would have suited better.  I don't know how all those kids managed to get organized into that gorgeous, cohesive unit that made the parents cheer. What I saw during class didn't give me much reason to predict that outcome. What I didn't see was that God had a plan for those kids that year, and he had a plan for me that not even I could screw up. He went before me and cleared a path. He gave me just enough mayhem to bring me to my knees, but never push me over the edge. He sent parents and teachers and generous donors into my life who brought fullness and sparkle to my meager efforts. He shaped me into what was necessary for that time by lavishly supplying everything I needed, and even beyond. I went into almost every situation a clueless impostor and came out smelling like a rose. I was the cracked pot (or crackpot) that held water anyway. I was the crooked stick that drew straight lines. What I did at that school was impossible for me. That's why God was glorified. Only he could do all that. But that's biblical. 

"Whoever speaks [should do so] as one who speaks oracles of God; 

whoever serves, as one who serves by the strength that God supplies—

in order that in everything God may be glorified through Jesus Christ. 

To him belong glory and dominion forever and ever. Amen." —1 Peter 4:11

Am I saying that volunteering to do jobs for which you are uniquely unqualified is always the way to go? Hehe. NO. I'm saying that you should do everything by the strength that God supplies so he gets the glory. It's just more obvious that's happening when you're out of your depth. 

Want to see something freakishly fantastic about this verse? 

That word "supplies" up there? The Greek word used is "chorēgei." It means "funds and leads a chorus of performers, bearing all the expenses necessary to stage a grand event."  Are you freaking kidding me right now?! Amazing! Obviously, nobody knows better than God how much effort and expense goes into a theatrical production. When he "supplies," that's the level of supply we're talking about. God is so serious that his son Jesus be glorified in our lives, that he supplies us with everything we need to make our lives into a grand event that makes people say, "Wow, God did that?" He's not about spray glitter and cheap illusions. He sends in real tigers and lights the batons on fire! 

Well, I only lasted a year being a music teacher, but I'm still out of my depth. I'm a mom now.

And being a mom is a lot like directing a theatrical production. I am so encouraged that even though I'm still the Befuddled Ringleader, I have a heavenly Dad who not only leads my little chorus of performers, he completely funds my efforts with strength and creativity when I have none of my own. He makes this grand event I call my life a success. He even does special effects! The applause at the final curtain will be his.

                                                          Leave me a comment! :D

Worry Worry Worry Worry Worry

This Complete Breakfast - Day 7

Do you worry?

It seems like there's never a shortage of things to worry about. Health. People. Money. A zombie apocalypse. Heck, I'm married to an airline pilot. I could worry every day he's up there flying that he's going to become a headline. Here's another thing to worry about: The Bible says HERE that worrying is a sin. Bam. Now we can worry about worrying! Even the word "worry" looks worried to me. And it sounds worried. Say the word "worry" out loud several times and you realize it's a great onomatopoeia… doesn't it sound like something spinning out of control with pieces flying off in every direction?

That's about how the ancient Greeks defined it.

For reals. To them, the idea of worry or anxiety meant being drawn in different directions, shattering a person's soul into pieces. Conversely, their idea of peace was wholeness—that all the necessary pieces of life were joined together to form a whole. Picture your soul like a big jigsaw puzzle. Peace means you're put together and have a complete picture. Worry means there are pieces of you in the couch cushions, under the fridge, in the back of the closet, mixed with Cheerios in the cup holder of a minivan, and a few pieces might even be on their way to Goodwill in a bag of used toys. You're all over the place and you can't get yourself together! Your loving heavenly Father doesn't want that for you.

Maybe that's why he told us to do something rather unusual… He wants us to throw stuff on him.  You heard me. Throw stuff. On him. Here you go:

"Cast all your anxiety on him because He cares for you." —1 Peter 5:7

Ever heard that song from the 1970s that was written about this verse? 

"I cast all my cares upon you; I lay all of my burdens down at your feet. 

And any time I don't know what to do, I will cast all my cares upon you." 

That is a fantastic song, and I sang it incessantly as a kid. Mostly because it was pretty to harmonize on. If you haven't heard it, it's a slow, calm lullabyish kind of song. (If you're super curious, you can listen to it HERE.) And that's great for after you've calmed down. But what about when you're still full of that anxiety and you haven't cast it yet? What does it even mean to cast something, anyway? It means to hurl it forcefully away from you! Give it the old fling-boogie action! Heave-ho it like a desperate shot from half court at the final buzzer! Hard to capture that sentiment in a lullaby. I think we need sound effects, personally. Let me know if you come across a good one for this.

Why does God want us to hurl all our crap on him?

Because he's our great big Daddy and he cares for us. He takes a special interest in each of his kids and is concerned by what concerns us. Not to mention, he can handle it so much better than we ever could. We aren't meant to carry worry and anxiety in our hearts. It eats away at us like a cancer, literally making us sick, fracturing us into splinters in proper Greek fashion. We are weak. God is strong. He wants us to experience the wholeness of peace, and protect us from stomach ulcers and panic attacks. His command requires our complete trust and belief, because worry is an act of unbelief. But who better to trust than the One who cares for us most?

Okay Lord, get out your catcher's mitt…

Leave me a comment! :D

"Sometimes I Feel Ugly..."

My little Winkerbean just said that to me today.

"Sometimes I feel ugly, and I want to hide." My heart broke when I heard those words come out of that pretty little mouth. Those beautiful, perfect, cupid's bow lips that I used to steal kisses from when she was a sleeping infant were now speaking of ugliness. Her own ugliness? I realized two earth-shattering things at the same time.

First, my little girl isn't so little any more.

Little kids think about life inside their little universe. They delight in the tickle of ladybug feet across their palms. They chase bubbles. They are just beginning to understand that there are other people in the world besides themselves and their immediate family. I have yet to see a little kid who is self-conscious. Winkerbean isn't little. She's starting to consider how other people see her. She's going to be nine years old before I blink.

The second thing I realized was my ghastly mistake...

I'm horrified when I think about it. I have tried on clothes with a disgusted look on my face, muttering under my breath that I should just wear a potato sack instead, to hide my ugly body. I have yanked out gray hairs and bemoaned the fact that I'm getting old too soon and don't want to lose my pretty brunette locks. I have compared myself to others whom I find more attractive than myself and given in to discouragement... all while my daughter looks on and absorbs everything. And now, with tears streaming down my face, I realize what I've done. I've taught her that what she wears is for other people to see and appreciate. That getting older is not an honor, but a dreadful curse. That the way to tell if you're beautiful is to look around you and see how you compare.

I would never say those things to her. But I have... just not with words.

This is one more example of how the student becomes like the teacher. But this teacher has just repented. I know my loving heavenly Father is heartbroken to hear me utter words of ugliness... when I believe the lie that my beauty comes from the outside. Just as heartbroken as I am when my little girl says those things about herself. It sounds preposterous to me that my little girl feels ugly, but it is no less preposterous when I feel it. The truth is, God made us both, and he's the one who gets to decide what ugly is.

"I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. 

Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well." —Psalm 139:4

I'm not on the ugly list. Maybe I am to some people, but not to my Creator.

"For the LORD sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, 

but the LORD looks on the heart.” —1 Samuel 16:7b

I'm so sorry, little Winkerbean. I made a mistake, and I was so wrong. I AM beautiful... because God made me that way. I forgot that. God help me, I need to be a better example of that from now on. You are a breathtaking, lovely girl, inside and out, because God made you that way. You have a beautiful smile, a beautiful mind, and a beautiful heart. Don't ever hide that.

Ten Motherhood Confessions

Motherhood is an adventure, not a science. The evidence...

1. My children regularly eat their siblings' leftovers as a snack.

2. I find a great deal of cleaning motivation from watching Hoarders.

3. That little first grader with bits of oatmeal in her hair, running to catch the bus, wearing one sock and carrying her shoes? Yeah, that was my kid.

4. I often eat chocolate first, then pray when I feel a little better.

5. I've had this happen more times than I can count: Having just imparted a particularly profound nugget of grown-up wisdom to my eager young children, I realize they ran off about five minutes ago and I've been talking to myself.

6. I sometimes stay up later than I should to get some "me time." The next day, I frown more than I smile.

7. I have a dog primarily to clean up food and beverage disasters. She stays busy.

8. I fell asleep in a pile of laundry earlier today.

9.  I've had to look up my own phone number before.

10. During my sleepy days with my third newborn, I came within three seconds of walking out to get the mail with one boob hanging out. 

And there are so many more, but we'll leave those for another post. ;) Things like this are the reason I know God can draw a straight line with a crooked stick. It's only logical that He get the glory for how awesome my kids are turning out.  Can you relate to any of these?

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This Is the Day

We hear this verse by itself a lot. 

We hear people sing it in a song, or say it to someone else who's looking a little mopey. We mutter it under our breath when the baby's crying, a pot's boiling over, and we've just dropped an entire plate of spaghetti on the floor. It's almost a way of saying, "I hate this day, I can't handle it, but I'm supposed to have a good attitude. So I'm going to put on a smile and remind myself that I should be happy right now, because God put me in this situation!" We also see this verse plastered over breathtaking photos of God's creation and made into cute little fridge magnets. The mistaken and dangerous notion that crops up is, "cheer up, because God's creation is pretty to look at. Check out this sunrise or those daisies. Now, don't you feel better?  Every day is a great day, simply because God made it." 

 Yeah, that'll cheer you right up. Or not.

It's true that every day is a day that God has made. And it's also true that we are told to be glad when trials come our way… not necessarily "glad" to be going through them, but glad that God is using them to make us more like Jesus. But some days we just don't feel like rejoicing and being glad. Nobody feels glad when they lose their job, their marriage, or their child. Nobody felt like rejoicing when our country was attacked and thousands of innocent people died fiery deaths in the World Trade Center towers. Especially since Scripture is clear that there is "a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance," is this verse really saying that we're required daily to rejoice and be glad?

I don't think so. 

If you get out your Hebrew dictionary (because everybody's got one), and look up this little word for "made," you'll see the meaning it was trying to get across: "accomplished."  This is the day the Lord has accomplished? That sounds a bit bigger than just making a day happen. It sounds like he was busy… but doing what? Let's back up and read it again, only with the four verses that come before it: 

This is the gate of the LORD;

the righteous shall enter through it.

I thank you that you have answered me

and have become my salvation.

The stone that the builders rejected

has become the cornerstone.

This is the LORD’s doing;

it is marvelous in our eyes.

This is the day that the LORD has made;

let us rejoice and be glad in it.

Did you catch it? Did you figure out what day we're actually celebrating?

If you're still waking up, I'll help you out. Think about this part… "This is the gate of the Lord; the righteous shall enter through it." The gate? THE Gate? As in the gate mentioned in John 10:9? 

"I [Jesus] am the gate; whoever enters through me will be saved."

Now consider the next part… "The stone that the builders rejected has become the cornerstone." THE Cornerstone? As in, the cornerstone mentioned all over the Bible, such as in Acts 4:11? 

"This Jesus is the stone that was rejected by you, the builders, which has become the cornerstone." 

This Psalm is all about Jesus saving us!

Jesus is the gate, the only way to God. He is our cornerstone. He answers our prayers. The day he made us righteous by giving us his righteousness, the day he became our salvation… that really WAS marvelous! What a staggering accomplishment on his part! That's something worth rejoicing over!

So even though those days will come when you're stuck in situations that make you feel hopeless, you don't have to try to fake happiness in the midst of those times. Because you have something better instead, something truly worth celebrating… the day the Lord accomplished your rescue. Let us rejoice and be glad in THAT!

How Jesus Is Our Stick in the Mud

This Complete Breakfast - Day 5 

Thanks for joining the Short People and me for our morning discussion! Look for more discussions under the "This Complete Breakfast" tab if you'd like to follow along with organized links rather than scrolling through posts. ;)

"I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, 

he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing." —John 15:5

We have several grapevines in our yard... 

This verse makes so much sense when we think about the way the grapevines grow. Before there were ever any grapes, or even any branches or leaves, there had to grow that thick vine at the center. It's the oldest and strongest part of the plant, and it never moves from that spot. It brings the life-giving water and nutrients up from the soil. The sap flows from it into the crazy, young branches that go shooting out all over the place. During spring and early summer, the grape plant quadruples in size as the branches seem to take on a life of their own, changing almost by the hour. It's hard to believe, when you push back all that thick foliage, that it's actually that humble little stick in the mud, covered in crusty bark, that's feeding life to all those fancy leaves and loads of heavy, plump grapes. One of those branches might even grow so long that it winds its way several yards through the tangle of branches until it's clear across the grape arbor from where it started!  But if you were to take a pair of shears and cut that branch off from the vine, you would soon know which one it was, because every leaf and every grape along that branch would die. Without that humble little stick, there would be no fruit. There would be no grape arbor at all. 

It's just like that with us and Jesus.

He is that humble beginning to God's family. He is the Firstborn of God, and all the rest of us grow out of him because of his life-giving presence. God's family has grown fast, just like the grape arbor does every year, but every single one of us can trace our lives back to Jesus. He's the one who created us and continues to sustain us, hold us up, and make it so we can bear fruit. We are his branches. 

What does it mean to abide in him?

Simply put, to abide means to stay. It means to not allow anything to get in the way of our connection to him. We can stay connected to him by talking to him all throughout the day, and by looking into his Word like we're doing right now. It can also mean that if something gets between us and Jesus, to make it right. That might mean confessing sin and apologizing to him, forsaking that choice and deciding to obey him from now on. It might mean giving up something that makes it harder for us to worship Jesus. If we don't have time for him because we're playing too many games or have too many distractions, it's time to give up those distractions. We need that time with Jesus to keep allowing his life to flow through us and help us bear fruit. 

He abides in us too? What does that mean?

It means he stays with us! He keeps pure, unbroken fellowship with us. He promised that he would never leave us, but that the Holy Spirit would make his home in us and continue to be a constant influence on us. He continues to lift us up, speak to us, and help us get rid of sin in our lives. This is like the water and nutrients that flow from the vine into the branches and produce all those fat, juicy grapes. His life flows into us and produces in us love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self control.  

None of that happens without Jesus. Just like there are no branches or grapes without the vine. 

Temptations Are God's Idea?

This Complete Breakfast - Day 4

This is part of a series of morning discussions I have with my sweet girlies before school. Feel free to join us, pass it on to a friend, or leave us a comment. I hope you have a blessed day!

No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he 

will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide 

the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it. —1 Corinthians 10:13

Imagine that you're sitting in school and your teacher hands out a test. 

On this test are questions about everything you've been taught so far. The number of questions you get right on this test will show how much you've really learned, and how much you've forgotten. Also imagine that right next to you is the answer key. You know, the teacher's book where all the answers are written in pink? It's sitting right there. All you have to do to get 100% on the test is open that book and look at the answers. All you have to do is cheat.

The "temptation" that this verse is talking about can be both of those things. 

Sometimes it can be like a test… a test that shows how strong your faith is, or how well you obey God when he asks you to do something hard (that's known as character). Other times it can be an enticement to sin, where you have to make a choice between right and wrong.  When does temptation happen? When people around us are sinning. When something bad or scary happens. When what's easiest isn't always what's best. This is hard stuff! There will be both tests and chances to sin, and we have to make a choice how we will respond with our attitudes and actions. How are we going to manage it?

This verse is reassuring, because it tells us three great things. 

1. There isn't a single test or sin choice that hasn't already happened to somebody else. 

Many other people are facing the same hard choices we face. In fact, the Bible even tells us that Jesus himself was tempted in all of the same things, but never sinned. What a great comfort that Jesus knows exactly what we're going through!

2. God won't ever make you face a temptation that is too hard to overcome. 

That means he won't put a 12th grade exam in front of you if you're only in third grade! It also means that you won't be too baffled to make the right call when it comes down to whether to sin or obey. The right choice will be clear. Even if you don't have the strength by yourself to do the right thing, he will give you the power to do it.

3.   There will always be an escape route out of trouble. 

God will provide you with a new destination, a path that takes you in the right direction, away from sin and away from danger… toward success.

Temptations—both tests and chances to sin—don't have to turn out badly. They are God's idea, for our good! Like a great teacher and Dad, God isn't just going to fill our heads with nice facts about himself and how great it is to obey him. He's going to give us chances to try them out in obedience, to see that they really work. This increases our faith in him. Don't be scared of temptation and trials. These can be awesome times that bring great glory to God! 

To Hear My Name

Mr. Boy is almost two. 

He's in that charming stage when the vocabulary is expanding by the day while the pronunciation is adorably inaccurate. He's learning all the words he finds important first…  Tea (which is any drinkable liquid). Eat. Dump Truck. He knows many, many words that he can't yet say, but he can point to them. And for every word he needs but doesn't know, there's always a sound effect to fall back on. 

He's got his family members all sorted out.

His sisters are "SeeSee" and "Didi" and they go on the "rrrrrrrRRRRRrrmmmmththbtbtbt!!!" every day to school. "Dah-ee" puts on his "shew" and his "hatch" and goes out to fly his "sssssshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhffffffhheewwwwwwwww!!!" Everyone's sorted out. 

Everyone except me.

Mr. Boy doesn't say my name. He doesn't say "mama" or even "mah." He doesn't seem to know what to call me. 

The other day, The Captain asked him, "Do you want to go for a bike ride?

"Yeah!" he cheered.

"Okay, can you say bye-bye to Mommy?"

He blew a kiss. "Bye-bye, Dump Truck."

I guess I should feel pretty special since dump trucks are THE best thing ever in his mind.

We do baby roll call occasionally to see if he can say all of our names. The Captain points to each of us and says, "Who's that?" Mr. Boy will say each name in turn. He'll even point to himself and say "Beebee!" 

Then The Captain points to me and says, "Who's that?" 

Mr. Boy smiles. "Wassat?"

"This is Daddy. Now who is this?"

Another smile. "Kweekwee bastutat!"

"No, this is Mama. Can you say, 'Mama'?"

Huge smile this time. "Dubai! Wee-shweebee-dat!" 

"No. MAHH-MA." The Captain enunciates slowly while pointing at me.

"BEEEEE-BEE." Mr. Boy mimics in the slow drawl while pointing at himself. 

I look into his big blue eyes. "Buddy, don't you want to say, 'Mama'?"

He leaps into my arms and says "Awwwwww." He hugs my neck and pats my hair with his grubby little palms. I'll take it.

What is it about this, though? Why does it matter to me so much?

I know my little guy loves me. I see it in the smiles and the hugs. I see it when he drags out a huge board book and backs into my lap. I see it when he looks intently into my face after I've been crying and strokes my cheek, earnestly assuring me that "we tree ba tabba tot, she kweekweesheeshee." I appreciate that. Especially since it's so true. 

But I want to hear him say my name. 

It's not that I'm dissatisfied with my son. I love him to pieces no matter what he calls me. I wouldn't love him more if he got this right. It's just a hole that will have to wait to be filled. It's a tiny hole with a tiny sadness inside it, but it's there. And that sadness isn't being wasted, because I think I just understood something about God my Father…

He loves to hear me say his name. In fact, he asks me to!

Oh give thanks to the LORD; call upon his name;

make known his deeds among the peoples!

Sing to him, sing praises to him;

tell of all his wondrous works!

Glory in his holy name;

let the hearts of those who seek the LORD rejoice!

Psalm 105:1-3

The name of the LORD is a strong tower;

the righteous man runs into it and is safe.

Proverbs 18:10

Ascribe to the Lord the glory due his name;

worship the Lord in the splendor of his holiness.

Psalm 29:2

The name of the Lord is a big deal in the Bible, and rightly so. 

We should call on his name, often and loudly. Because it's a wonderful name, deserving of praise. Because it's a safe place to rest our hearts. Because he deserves it. And, I think, because he loves to hear his children say his name. I'm going to go say his name to him right now... because now I know how much it will warm his heart.  

The Evil Queen Attitude

This Complete Breakfast - Day 3

Here's another morning Bible discussion designed for kiddos. Praying you have a blessed day. :)

“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility 

consider others better than yourselves.” --Philippians 2:3

What is selfish ambition?

Having ambition means wanting something and being ready to work hard to get it. Having ambition isn’t always a bad thing. It can help you reach a goal. It’s when it becomes selfish that it becomes a sin. Being selfish means you care about yourself more than anyone else. If you have selfish ambition, that means you want to get your own way, even if it hurts other people. You might say things like, “Move out of my way!”

What is vain conceit?

If we act vain, it means that we worry too much about what other people think of us. It means we want others to think we are talented and good-looking, and we might feel pretty upset if they don’t. Being conceited means thinking we are amazing in every way. Everyone has their faults, but if we’re conceited, we have a hard time seeing our faults.

Remember the evil queen in the story of Snow White?

Now there’s somebody full of selfish ambition and vain conceit! She wanted to be the most beautiful in all the land, and worried so much about others thinking she was beautiful that she was willing to kill! She only cared about herself and getting what she wanted, and she did some pretty terrible things in order to be seen as the best. Her attitude was so dangerous that it made her downright evil!

This verse warns us that having the same attitude is also dangerous for us. We might not be polishing a poisoned apple for anyone, but we still might be hurting others by:

• Insisting that our way is better
• Not letting others go first
• Being unwilling to share with others
• Spending so much time thinking about ourselves that we don’t notice that others need help

...and worst of all,

• Focusing on ourselves so much that people don’t want to hear about Jesus because they don’t want to be anything like us!

What’s the answer? How can we avoid having this awful attitude?

The last part of the verse gives us a clue: “...but in humility consider others better than yourselves.” IS everyone else better than you are? Is that what God thinks? Hmmm. That’s not the right question. The truth is, it doesn’t really matter. God simply asks us to consider others better than ourselves. That means treat them better and love them more than we do ourselves. That’s a sure way to keep us from becoming evil villains full of selfish ambition and vain conceit!

How To Be A Geyser

This Complete Breakfast - Day 2

Here's today's breakfast discussion with my Short People. You'll find the links to other discussions in the "This Complete Breakfast" tab at the top. :) 

"Keep your heart with all vigilance, for 

from it flow the springs of life." —Proverbs 4:23

What is a spring?

In this case, it's not a Slinky or a season of the year. It's water, shooting up from the ground! It keeps on flowing, toward the plants, animals, and people around it. If it's good, clean water, then that's a really great thing for living things. They get to drink it and grow big and healthy. 

But what happens if pollution gets into the spring? 

Then pollution goes into the water, and it gets all over everything! Everyone who drinks or even touches that water will get sick! Even a little bit of pollution in the water isn't good, because it can cause sickness that nobody notices for a long time. 

How could someone keep the spring from being polluted?

They would have to protect that spring! They'd have to tell people, "Hey, you can't dump that garbage here, there's fresh water coming out!" They might need to build a fence around the spring to keep animals from pooping in it. They might build a sign to let people know not to swim there. How else could they protect the spring? Are they being mean by making rules to protect the spring? No. They're being kind, because they're trying to keep everyone healthy with clean water. 

This verse tells us that our hearts are like that spring, and need just as much protection!

When Jesus comes to live in our hearts, he gives us new hearts—He starts the spring of fresh, clean water flowing out—and makes us more like him. Our hearts are where he tells us to hide his word, so we can remember it. Our hearts are where we make choices about our behavior… whether they are good choices or bad. The words that we say, and the attitudes we show others are like the water flowing out of our spring. Our words land on others and can bring them life and help them grow. If we let our hearts get polluted by bad ideas, bad thoughts, mean attitudes, or even movies or songs that aren't good for us, those ideas and thoughts are going to come out onto others through our words.

What are some bad attitudes, thoughts, or TV shows that might cause pollution in your heart?

The Bible tells us to protect our hearts from those things.  Part of a parent's job is to help protect your heart... we might do that by making rules for you that act like fences to keep the pollution out.  That way, what comes out of us is good for us and for others!

Photo credit: Wikipedia.org, Castle Geyser