7 Baby Items I Found Pointless

Babies need so much stuff. Seriously. 

I have a few friends who are pregnant and navigating the world of fantastic baby gear, some for the first time, and one who's just getting back into it. There are a ton of decisions to make! One asked me what she should register for, and I made a great list. But as I surfed the websites full of sparkly baby goodies, I kept running across items that made me chuckle, because I remembered how underwhelmingly not useful they were when my Short People were tiny. So I made another list. Here are a few of my less-than-awesome purchases and the reasons I didn't need them. I hope it helps you out. And congratulations for needing to shop in the first place, whether it's for you or someone else!

1. Diaper Genie

Why: Because while they do help somewhat, they really don't get rid of the odor completely. Nobody wants to gaze at their sleeping infant to a background stench of county fair port-a-potty. Take the stink bombs outside right after they happen! It's good to see the sky periodically anyway. 

2. Baby wipe warmers

Why: Because babies adapt to having a cold wipe to the butt pretty early on in life if they're not expecting otherwise. Imagine her shock and ensuing squeals, however, the first time in an echoing public bathroom where no wipe warmer is available. Pass the ear plugs! If you're set on the idea anyway, try folding a wipe and tucking it into your bra to warm against your body while you get out the other supplies and undo snaps. Saves electricity!

3. Baby wash cloths

Why:  Use the ones you already have as long as they're nice and soft. I'm not against wash cloths in general, just those sold for babies, because they're too thin and small.  If you get any of those at all, get maybe one package for wiping your baby's face. But again, that's a big "if."

4. Bottle warmers

Why:  Just in my experience, I almost always managed to get distracted and overheat the milk or food. And it's just one more appliance to take up space on the counter and require cleaning by hand. A nice, big coffee mug half-filled with hot water is just as effective, and I bet you already have one!  Experiment with microwave times until you find one that gets the water to the perfect temp and set the bottle in there. You won't have to worry about it getting hotter and hotter.

5. Pacifier thermometers 

Why: It's an awesome idea, but even babies who like pacifiers are different kids when they're sick. My babes never wanted to keep this kind of thermometer in their mouths, either because they didn't feel good and it wasn't the right binky, their noses were stuffed up and I couldn't get an accurate reading, or because they were nauseated and gagged on it.  The rectal thermometer is touted as the most accurate, but honestly, I'd sacrifice a couple tenths of a degree to avoid being pooped on repeatedly. Get the kind that scans the forehead, trust me!

6. Store-bought hooded bath towels

Why: Store-bought ones such as those made by Circo (Target brand) are made from thin fabric and soak through quickly. That means a wet lap for you, and a chilled backside for the babe. The chillier the baby, the more crying there is!  These towels also usually have huge, dumb appliques on the hoods which are cute, but not absorbent, and tend to get in the way.  You are better off making your own from full-sized, thick, terry towels and maybe decorating the hood with a little bit of baby-themed satin ribbon. Check the web for tutorials such as this one.

7. Crib bumper

Why:  They are so cute and iconic in those online nursery photos. But nowadays, doctors are urging parents to avoid them. See this article for their reasons. For my own part, the bumper just became one more thing to wash when the puke started to fly. A few months later, it became the step ladder for Baby Houdini. I'd rather spare you that heart attack and just say don't bother! 

I'm sure there are many other things I'd find pointless if I went out and looked, but these are the goodies I registered for, thought I needed, and then dismissed after experience proved otherwise. Your own experience will be your best teacher. Just enjoy this time of discovery, wonderment, and of course, shopping!